A strong support system and focusing on hope were key for Kelli Jones' battle with breast cancer earlier this year.
Now cancer free, the 43-year-old mother of two works from her Jefferson City home as a financial advisor with a St. Louis-based company. She's also active with the HALO Foundation, which helps homeless and at-risk children locally and across the world. Jones serves on the HALO board of directors and also volunteer with the group. The Jones family enjoys cheering on the Mizzou Tigers, trout fishing and evenings on their back patio.
In honor of October's Breast Cancer Awareness Month, Jones, along with two other area survivors, shared some of their journey battling breast cancer. Read a different woman's story the previous two weeks this month in the Health section, colored pink in celebration.
The following answers have been edited for clarity and space constraints:
Q. Explain your diagnosis and treatment. How are you now?
A. I was diagnosed with stage 1, hormone positive breast cancer in March 2021 after just turning 43. (For those who are familiar, mine was the most common type, invasive ductal carcinoma ER+/PR+/HER-).
While I have no family history of breast cancer, I do have a family and personal history of cysts. I found the lump myself in May 2020 and had a physical exam. However, I'd recently had a clear mammogram just a couple of months before and have a history of cysts. It felt just like my prior cysts, so we did not push forward with testing at that time. I went back for a routine appointment in March of this year, and after a mammogram, ultrasound and biopsy, we had a confirmed cancer diagnosis.
I started with surgery to remove the tumor. I opted for a lumpectomy, based on the size and several details of my diagnosis. The decision between a lumpectomy and mastectomy is difficult, and you wonder if you're making the right choice. Along with the tumor, they also removed two lymph nodes for testing and thankfully found them negative for cancer cells. Once I'd healed enough from surgery, I began four weeks of daily radiation treatment at the SSM St. Mary's Cancer Center. The ladies there were a bright spot every single day, and I missed seeing them when I was finished - kind, professional and perpetually smiling. I will also take an estrogen blocking pill for a number of years, which is something most people don't see. We think that after treatment, life should go back to "normal." When treatment ends, the breast cancer journey continues, many times behind the scenes. I believe strongly in my body's ability to heal, so I've also incorporated some integrative, natural therapies to help strengthen my immune system and really just help me live as healthy as possible.
I'm cancer free now and so grateful. I feel better than I've ever felt, physically and mentally. Although I've lived pretty healthy the last 10 years, I've made a stronger commitment to making choices that give my body the best chance at staying cancer free. I'm about 12 weeks out from my last radiation treatment and still healing, but I'm grateful for my body doing what it's capable of.
Q. How did you feel when you first heard the news?
A. It was shocking and devastating. Possibly the most scared I've ever felt. I have two children (who were 10 and 14 at the time), and I didn't know what the diagnosis meant for my future with them. I remember crying and saying to my husband, "No, this isn't supposed to be my story." The weeks after diagnosis were the worst because I had the diagnosis but no details on what it meant. How bad was it? What treatment would be recommended? What kind of side effects would there be? The weeks of not knowing were the hardest. But I also know I'm a fighter, so I pulled my friends and family close for strength and decided to do what I had to do with grace and trust in God's plan for me.
Q. What were some of the obstacles you faced? How did you overcome them?
A. Lack of control. There's so much you just don't know. It's easy for fear and worry to take over when you focus on what you can't control. I just wanted to do something. To give myself some sense of control (and maybe distraction), I focused on an anti-cancer lifestyle. I changed my diet, focused on getting good sleep, made sure I was moving my body and managing stress (to the extent possible). And I focused on my faith. I've had a few doctors ask if I had some kind of spiritual practice, and now I understand why. It got me through and brought me peace during a time when our life was turned upside down.
Keeping a positive attitude and focusing on gratitude can be challenging during a cancer diagnosis and treatment. But every day, I knew I had a choice to face it with fear or with strength and gratitude. I had doctors tell me (and have since read many times), that there truly is a link between mindset and healing. That doesn't mean I didn't have bad days. When I needed to cry, I did. But most days, I kept my eyes on everything I have to be thankful for and making the most of the present moment. It's strange, it's so overwhelming and scary to go through cancer, but it also made the beauty of every single day so much more clear. I'm beyond grateful for that gift.
Q. What was your support system like, and how important is that in the process?
A. My support system was and still is incredible. I believe 1,000 percent it's important for healing. I needed to heal not just from surgery and radiation but from the emotional stress of going through cancer. And I needed to make lifestyle changes to help my body be stronger going forward. All of those things are a million times easier with family and friends in your corner, helping with the daily things, giving hugs, listening and praying.
Q. Were there any community programs or services you used that were particularly beneficial?
A. Because I have a strong support system, I didn't look into community programs at that time. But I did reach out to friends who'd been through breast cancer, and their support was tremendous during the scariest times. Hearing from survivors helped me stay focused on hope.
Q. What message would you like to provide to women in the community who have been diagnosed with breast cancer or about breast health in general?
A. Be your own advocate. The first doctor, the first interpretation of imaging or test results, even treatment recommendations may not be the right fit for you. Keep asking questions and meeting different health care professionals until you find what fits. No one knows your situation, your body or your health the way you do. And also, know that tomorrow is not promised. As a relatively young, healthy woman, I really didn't understand that the way I do now. Every day matters. Lifestyle choices (diet, exercise, stress management, sleep, community, faith) matter. Every opportunity to be kind, to connect with friends or family, to say "I love you" matters. And lastly, take care of you. As women, we spend much of our life caring for others. It can be difficult to slow down and give yourself the rest and time you need. It's critical to set boundaries and give yourself this time to heal and rest during this season of life.