If you are someone who likes to give or receive books for Christmas, then I have a special recommendation for you. Gordon Livingston has written a gem.
Although the title might not appeal to everyone, I can assure you it is not another self-improvement book filled with pat advice. First published in 2004, this book is now in its 10th printing and has been translated into more than 20 languages. Livingston draws on a lifetime of experience as a psychiatrist and a father of four, who unfortunately is no stranger to tragedy. He had the great misfortune of losing a 6-year-old son to leukemia and his eldest son to suicide. He offers a fresh, unique perspective that provided me (and millions of other readers) with a great deal of insight and comfort.
The late Elizabeth Edwards wrote the foreword to this book after meeting Livingston in an online community for bereaved parents. Edwards likened Livingston's 30 essays to the voice of a real friend "who says the hard things that we need to know if we are to be stronger, better, more generous, more courageous, and kinder." She sums up the heart of this book perfectly, and speaks openly about Livingston's impact on her personal life. She credits him with helping her find herself again after the devastating loss of her own son.
The following seven truths are just some of the many truths illuminated in this book: "We are what we do." "Any relationship is under the control of the person who cares the least." "We are afraid of the wrong things." "Only bad things happen quickly." "Forgiveness is a form of letting go, but they are not the same thing." "The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas." "It's a poor idea to lie to oneself."
If some of these essay titles resonate with you as they did with me, then I believe you would enjoy giving or receiving this book along with Livingston's follow-up title "And Never Stop Dancing: Thirty More True Things you Need to Know Now." Sometimes a book comes along and is exactly what you need at just the right time. "Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart" was that book for me, and I hope it might be that book for you or for someone you care about.
Claudia Schoonover is director of Missouri River Regional Library.