"What are we going to do tonight?" Pinky asks.
"The same thing we do every night," the Brain answers. "Try to take over the world."
The animated characters had gathered around a conference table in a secret, underground lair with an assortment of evil-doers, including: Professor Chaos and General Disarray from "South Park;" Dr. No and Dr. Evil, accompanied by Mini-Me, from the James Bond movies and Austin Powers films, respectively; and Marvin the Martian, a Looney Toons and Merrie Melodies character.
"And just how do you plan to take over the world," asks Dr. Evil, his little finger perched menacingly at the corner of his mouth.
"Simple," the Brain replies. "By promoting a "Don't Vote!' campaign."
"A "Don't Vote!' campaign. Brilliant!" exclaims General Disarray. "How does it work?"
"Easy," the Brain answers. "We capitalize on an existing trend - low voter turnout. Cole County Clerk Marvin Register - no relation to Marvin the Martian, by the way - predicts a 34 percent turnout for Tuesday's general election. That means when I vote, my vote is three times more powerful than if every voter goes to the polls."
"I don't understand," interjects Professor Chaos, whose math skills suffer because he keeps skipping class in a desperate bid to flood the world using a garden hose.
"Let me try to explain," says Dr. No. "If I'm one voter among 100, my vote is one percent of the total, but if I'm one among 34, my vote is nearly 3 percent of the total - nearly three times more powerful."
"Precisely," says the Brain. "So if we encourage more people not to vote, our vote becomes even more powerful. We could become 10 times more powerful, 50 times, 75 times, until eventually we are the only voters."
"And then we take over the world!" General Disarray exclaims."
"But what if voters don't stop voting?" asks Pinky. "What if people reverse the trend?"
"The Earth has some of those people," observes Marvin the Martian. "The secretary of state, county clerks, newspaper editors, groups that encourage voting."
A collective booing and hissing emanates from the assembly.
"They must be stopped," the Brain shouts. "Our diabolical scheme depends on increasing apathy, complacency and frustration." Maniacal laughter erupts among the evil-doers as the Brain proclaims: "The only ones who can foil our plan to take over the world are active, engaged voters."